Both of Us
by vicesandconverse
Summary: Dean didn't like this. He didn't like seeing Seth cry, and he'd seen this scene too many times in the past three weeks. The only difference was instead of being curled up on the bathroom tiles or lying on Dean's mattress, they both were on the living room couch, a pair of clippers on the floor surrounded by a mess of dark brown curls.


**Both of Us**

"Shh, Shh, it's ok Seth," Dean whispered into Seth's ear, rocking Seth's crying form back and forth in his arms. "It's ok, just please stop crying." But Seth didn't stop crying. If anything, the tears streaming down his cheeks just kept flowing faster.

Dean didn't like this. He didn't like seeing Seth cry, and he'd seen this scene too many times in the past three weeks. The only difference was instead of being curled up on the bathroom tiles or lying on Dean's mattress, they both were on the living room couch, a pair of clippers on the floor surrounded by a mess of dark brown curls.

And the morning had started out so well.

For the first time in a while, Dean had woken up first. Seth was peacefully sleeping next to him, his breathing even and perfectly slow. Dean smiled. He didn't look like someone with Stage 2 Kidney Cancer. He looked like the normal, stubborn, pain-in-the-ass young adult he'd been before this whole mess started. No chemotherapy, no upcoming surgery, just the annoying authority sellout he used to be. Because of that, Dean couldn't help but run his fingers through Seth's hair. Instead of soothing Seth like he'd expected, a giant clump of loose curls was now in his palms as Seth's eyes began to flutter open.

"Morning," Seth sleepily said as his gaze connected with Dean's, smiling gently. Dean just stared at him, mouth agape, feeling extremely guilty when Seth's face fell.

"What's wrong-" Seth didn't continue. His eyes fell to the clump of hair in Dean's hand, his eyes widening as he brought his own hand up to his head to run his fingers through his hair. Sure enough, when he pulled away, his own palm was now full of hair.

"Seth…" Dean didn't know how to respond. What could he possibly say? _Hey, sorry your hair's falling out because your body's full of poison_? In the end, though, he didn't have to say anything.

"Do you wanna…?" Seth began, bringing his eyes back up to Dean's. Dean already knew what he was going to ask. The answer was no. No, he didn't want to do this. He didn't want to cut all Seth's hair off. He didn't want to have to look at Seth every day and be reminded that there was still a 26% change he wouldn't survive this. In the end, though, Dean simply replied by grabbing Seth's hand and pulling him up and out of the bed. Slowly, they both ended up in the living room.

"I'll be right back," Dean said, sitting Seth down on the couch and walking into the bathroom to grab his pair of clippers. Every voice in his head was still screaming at him not to do this. He still, however, gathered up the supplies and brought then back into the living room. Seth had drawn his knees up to his chest, his eyes big and looking at the clippers in fear. Dean sighed and sat down next to him, wrapping an arm around his thin shoulders.

"Seth, we don't have to do this." Dean said. Seth simply closed his eyes and curled even farther in on himself.

"Yes we do," Seth said. Dean knew Seth was right, but god, he wished that he wasn't. Dean placed one last kiss on Seth's soft curls before turning Seth towards him. Dean reluctantly placed the razor on Seth's hairline before switching the clippers on and drawing a stripe across the top of Seth's head. Several free hair strands fell onto the cushions and a small whimper escaped Seth's lips.

"Hey, it's ok," Dean reassured, gently forcing Seth to look at him. Seth simply closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around himself in a self-hug. Dean sighed once again and continued to shave the front section of Seth's hair. Once finished, he motioned for Seth to turn around so as he could complete the back. Two minutes later, Dean had swept all the curls off the couch and Seth didn't have a single hair on his head.

Dean could see the tears in Seth's eyes before they even started falling. He quickly got up and ran to his bedroom, grabbing the first beanie he could find and running back to Seth. He could see now that Seth had allowed his tears to fall. He sat down and pulled Seth into his lap, yanking the grey beanie over his bald head and letting Seth cry into his chest.

This had been going on for twenty minutes now. Seth sobbing and Dean rubbing small circles on his back. Dean hated this. He knew why Seth hated it too. Less than thirty minutes ago, Dean and Seth could walk outside and not have a soul know Seth was sick. Now, with a shaved head and even more dominant pale features, Seth looked sick. He looked like a cancer patient. Every time Dean looked at him, he'd be reminded that the younger man had less than a ¾ chance of living. And he hated that.

Once Seth had forced himself to stop crying, he brought his red rimmed eyes up to Dean's. "S-Sorry…"

"What did I tell you three weeks ago?" Dean asked. Seth sighed and folded his hands on his lap.

"No apologizing."

"Right," Dean said, pecking Seth's nose. Seth's lips curled into half of a weak grin. It would do for now.

Suddenly, a loud knock brought them both out of their thoughts. Dean stood up and began to walk towards the door, Seth right on his heels. Turning the knob, Dean was soon greeted with Roman standing outside the door.

"I'm surprised you two are awake," Roman said, chuckling. Dean kept his blank expression, silently motioning that now wasn't the time. At this time, Seth choose to enter the doorframe. Roman quickly noticed the beanie covering his scalp and shut his mouth.

"You ready?" Roman asked. Dean slapped himself mentally for completely forgetting that Roman was taking Seth to chemotherapy today. They both looked over at Seth, who lightly nodded his head.

"Let me just get dressed," Seth said, turning around and heading back into Dean's bedroom. Roman turned his attention back to Dean.

"What happened?" Roman asked. Dean crossed his arms tightly over his chest.

"His hair started falling out this morning," Dean said. "Roman, I hate this, I hate this so much."

"I know," Roman replied. Dean didn't stop there, though.

"God, but why did this happen?" He accidently snarled. "I mean, almost every night he's got a trashcan by the bed and we've gone through a whole bottle of pain killers in a week!"

"Dean, I get it, you hate this," Roman said softly in an attempt to calm him down. "Just remember there's someone out there that hates this a hell of a lot more than you."

Dean's eyes slightly widened and Seth walked back to the door, dressed in one of Dean's old sweatshirts and a pair of sweatpants. "Ready." He looked over at Dean, still puffy eyed. "You alright?"

Dean faked a weak smile. "I'm fine," he replied, turning his attention back to Roman. "Have him back soon, alright? I'll be here cleaning up a little, so just call me if anything's up."

Roman nodded his head and pulled Seth out the doorway, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "We'll be fine." Dean leaned over to Seth and kissed his forehead, happy to see Seth's eyes light up a little, before watching Roman and Seth walk down the hall. He shut the door and walked back inside, heading towards the living room. He immediately looked at the clippers and the pile of hair on the floor. Seth's precious little curls that he used to hate so much and would always tie up and away from his face were now scattered on the carpet.

He remembered Seth curled up in his lap, crying over this unfortunate situation. Seth didn't need to cry, didn't deserve to cry. He deserved to be happy, to be wrestling, to be cashing in that stupid briefcase and becoming the WWE Champion. Now, the doctors didn't think he'd ever be strong enough to even step foot in a ring again.

Something in Dean snapped. He walked over towards the mess on the floor and picked the razor, staring at the blade. Before he could even process his own thoughts, Dean was bringing the clippers up to his own hairline, switching it on, and taking away a clump of tangled auburn strands from his head.

* * *

"You want anything to eat?" Roman asked as he drove. Chemotherapy had just finished and they were currently driving back to Dean's apartment.

"No, I'm fine," Seth said, his eyes drooping. Roman sighed. Chemotherapy took the life out of him.

"You sure? There's a ton of fast food joints on the way back to Dean's," Roman tried to fight back. Seth still shook his head.

"No, it won't taste good anyway," Seth replied, resting his forehead on the window and staring at the road. Since chemotherapy, everything tasted like cardboard to him. He only ever ate when Dean forced him to.

"Ok…" Roman said, focusing his eyes back on the road. Seth folded his hands over his lap. He knew Roman was only trying to help. This whole ordeal had hit everyone hard, and Seth knew how awful Roman felt not being able to help. "So, what are you and Dean gonna do tonight?"

"Probably watch a movie, go to bed, wake up in the middle of the night to me needing to vomit every five minutes," Seth said. He hated how negative he sounded. I mean, sure, he'd always had a chip on his shoulder and a bit of a sarcastic manner, but now, he felt his tongue was so sharp it could cut stone.

"Come on Seth, don't be like that," Roman said. Seth simply shrugged his shoulders. "I know it sucks right now, but-"

"There's still a 74% I'll be fine, I know," Seth said. "But Roman, that's still not even a ¾ shot. What if all this wasn't even worth it? What if I've been making you and Dean's lives miserable and I just end up dying anyway?"

"Seth, you're not going to die-"

"But I could!"

"But you won't," Roman said. "You're strong enough to fight this. I think so, and I know Dean thinks so too. And we need you to think so."

"I just," Seth began, but shut his mouth. "My head hurts, can we not talk anymore?"

Roman sighed once again. The rest of the ride home was silent except for the occasional honk of a driver. Seth sighed every few minutes and Roman didn't mutter a word. Eventually, the duo arrived at Dean's apartment complex and slowly made way to Dean's home.

Once at the door, Seth fumbled for the keys in his pocket. Roman spoke up. "You guys gonna be alright? I don't have anything to do-"

"We'll be fine," Seth said after finding his keys and shoving them into the lock. He heard the successful _click_ of the door and turned to face Roman. "Thanks."

"It's nothing, Seth," Roman replied, patting him on the shoulder and walking down the hall, not completely disappearing until he was completely sure Seth was safe inside. Seth walked into the apartment and locked the door behind him.

"Dean, I'm back," Seth gloomily exclaimed. He could hear Dean shuffling around.

"I'm in the bedroom," Dean yelled. Seth made his way to the bedroom door, entering the room before gasping in shock at the sight before him. Dean was sat on the bed, fumbling around with his phone before turning his head, his bald head, upwards to look at Seth. "So, how'd chemo go?"

"W-What did you do?" Seth asked, standing completely still as Dean stood up.

"Well," he began as he started moving towards Seth's frozen form. "This dork I know thought he could pull off no hair better than I could. And, obviously, I have to prove him wrong." At this point, he was standing right in front of Seth, keeping his cocky smirk plastered on his face.

"Y-You, you shaved your head!" Seth said.

"Yeah, I did," Dean said, wrapping his arms around Seth's middle. "And now I look like you. And I look amazing."

Seth's face flushed a pink color as he brought his gaze to the floor. "Dean, you didn't have to do that." Dean smiled.

"Yeah I did. This morning, actually, I asked you if we had to do this. You said 'Yes we do'. So _we_ did it," Dean replied. Seth threw his hands over his mouth and Dean couldn't hold back a chuckle.

"T-That's not what I meant-"

"I know Seth," Dean said. "I wanted to. If not having any hair on your little head is gonna help you get better, then I want to be as involved in that as possible. I want you to know that you're gonna get better, because I'm not gonna let you give up."

Seth looked back up into Dean's eyes and, for the first time in weeks, smiled. "I'm not gonna give up. I'm gonna get better so I can keep annoying you."

Dean's grin increased in size and he set a small kiss on Seth's forehead. They were going to get through this. Both of them.

* * *

 _This is based off a prompt that I found on Tumblr, which was:_

 _ **Person A is in treatment for cancer and is really upset about loosing all their hair, so person B shaves their head too.**_

 _Hopefully this turned out alright! If you liked it or have some tips on writing or anything of that sort, leave me a review! Thank you so much for reading!_

 _\- vicesandconverse_


End file.
